* This blog is dedicated to the bich (oh yes, I KNOW I spelled it wrong!), moderators at TWOP. Without Strenga et AL, I'd be happily posting-away along with the best of them. Unfortunately, TWOP is a little too heavy-handed, high-falootin' and downright unfriendly.
*(added 2011)-Amended to mean Strega's Real Housewives forum(s) and of course those Bravo Blogs that eat your comments w/o posting them. I still visit TWOP for the best snark.

*(Added April 30th, it has come to my attention that some of the rumors posted on this blog are definitely FALSE. Most rumors are clearly labeled as such, but in case I missed any, please keep that in mind)

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Is it DONE! yet?

ALEX(!), is DONE!

I checked-in with the BRAVO TALK BUBBLE, and SIMON was hash-tagging #IHATEJILLZARIN!, saying that he does too.
Then my computer crashed.
THE COUNTESS looked really great with her hair in an updoo, maybe the best I've seen her look ever, even-though she has been critiqued for doing the one-shoulder look too many times, I liked her dress too.
I watched the show while I restored my computer, and I took notes.
We were introduced to COURT, who was saying something about "Scandal~osity", I wasn't sure if that was the name of his book?
THE COUNTESS told COURT that she didn't think that she was MADONNA, but that she "could be the female BARRY WHITE." (HuH? BARRY WHITE is pretty darn talented COUNTESS, maybe even better than MADONNA).
KELLY did some kind of speech for her GOTHAM magazine event, and I did NOT hear her say "AMAZING" one time. She did kind-of ramble-on, something about how "accessories", "that's how we navigate through all of these styles and trends." -(KELLY). Did that make any sense? Because it didn't make sense to me. Maybe it was fashion jargon?
JENNIFER got caught saying about COURT, when he left with THE COUNTESS, "Whoever Luanne's date is, he's got bad hair and he's gay."
THE COUNTESS took some of the gals to her yoga place, "I'm a big Chopra fan."
This is about where I'm starting to reeeely notice that the ladies are being shuffled-around here.
I'm now convinced that BETHENNY shot some of her scenes later, and definitely separately from the rest of the group. Besides the fact that she's missing in most all of the group scenes, her face has that bloated look that it took-on later in her pregnancy.
They cut to a quick scene between JILL & KELLY. KELLY is mumbling something about SONJA. AND I REALLY WANTED TO HEAR WHAT THE HECK SHE WAS SAYING-JILL!
KELLY said, "I brought her a cleanse,""I wanted to bring something internal." (WHAT?)
But JILL kept interrupting and telling KELLY to "Stop saying "like" all the time."
KELLY lost her train of thought and we never did get to hear the rest of it.
SONJA told RAMONA and JENNIFER I think, that she is from SARATOGA, and that she started her modeling career by doing pageants.
RAMONA invited everyone to her 3 or 4 day pre-vow-renewal, girl's only getaway in The Virgin Islands.
(BETHENNY was not there, she was not in any of the scenes with the housewives).
They were all at JENNIFER'S apartment;
"Jennifer's apartment is AMAZING". -(KELLY)
"Who's coming?" -(JILL)
RAMONA came-in and broke the news that BETHENNY'S father has passed-away and JILL goes nuts. She went nuts about why she was not notified about this.
"Why does it always have to be about her (JILL)?" (RAMONA)
"You're not my friend" -(JILL to RAMONA)
ALEX has a thing or two she wants to say to JILL, but JILL will not let her get a word in edge-wise. ALEX tells JILL that she had a lot of nerve emailing her, (ALEX) about BETHENNY'S tragedy for gossip, and then there was a flash-back to when ALEX tried to tell JILL that BETHENNY was going-through some tough times, and JILL said something about how she, (JILL), didn't know how valid BETHENNY'S relationship with her father was anyhow.
JILL tries to throw ALEX out of JENNIFER'S house, "LEAVE", with a bitchy hand motion pointing for her to "GO"!.
"Can you stop talking for a minute?" (-ALEX to JILL)
JILL could not stop, so ALEX left in a huff after they both decided that they are DONE with each other.
After this confrontation, when ALEX had a moment in the confessional, she had on maybe the most HIDEOUS thing I have ever seen. The collar referenced a giant beige, fabric contraption, that resembled a chain made out-of paper-clips. Did THAT THING come out of BROOKLYN? Wherever it came from, I hope it goes back and we never see it again.
I think the idea was to add architectural details to the dress, but it was a miss in my opinion.
I do hope that GILMORE the artist chooses it to immortalize, even though I really never want to see it again-I mean it! I'm DONE!

*edited to add, I missed some stuff while my computer crashed. Maybe the best line of the night was when JILL said, "I was ambushed," "I wasn't ready to make-up. ...I didn't have my notes."
Does she mean her SCRIPT? OR, did she mean her S-H-I-T-list, that she uses to keep score?
Also, those FACEBOOK elves have been very busy tonight, but they cannot delete all of the crap. I'm copying the nasty comments & if they erase them I'll post some in the comments below.